I was going to blog about inane little things, empty vapid commentary that's one step away from insipid Victorian social chatter. But then I got to thinking...
...which is always dangerous.
I will be 27 in less than 6 months. I'm single, in the unmarried sense. I guess I am in a relationship; my twenties seem to be defined by that. I've never been married. Never had a kid. Never been divorced.
One of my friends is separated from her husband. Another friend's divorce was finalized a few months ago. A close family member is coming up on her divorce, I think. I recently got back in touch with a friend who's been divorced for five years. The divorce rate in this country is really high, and I am beginning to believe it, when it's beginning to show in the lives of my people.
It's inevitable to ask this question: what's the point in getting married? It seems like most of us are doomed. Or are we giving in too easily? Or getting married too early? I am willing to bet all of these folks didn't get married thinking, "Hey, we'll have a few good years of it, and then go our separate ways." I'm sure it was something more like "till death do us part" and then...something changed? and they parted. I'm pretty damned sure that most of us go into marriages thinking, "It's not going to happen to us. No divorce here."
So what is it? What changes? What makes us give up?
I'm trying very hard not to be jaded about the marriage thing. Don't get me wrong--I want to get married, preferably in the next five years, give or take a year or two. I believe in marriage, and making things work. I believe in faithfulness and perseverance and compromise and working hard at a lasting relationship.
But I am pretty sure all of those other people did, too.
So, what is it? What changes?
And I don't care that this is all strictly academic, and that I am about as far from the altar as I have ever been in my entire dating life. It's a good question to ask. It's a good thing to ponder.
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